Ola….and a tip!!!

Yes, I am backo!! I haven’t abandoned my blog! Yayyy!!! Blog mein toh kuch hai…kheench ke waapas le aati hai! 😀 Anyhoo….I find it very difficult these days to write. I login….check out the new themes…and logout. Right now, my eyes are burning, crying out for some sleep but I’ve decided to write something…even if it’s nonsense…but don’t worry…it’s not…i think… 😉

I still keep getting comments on posts I wrote long time ago….and it makes me sad to realise that I’ve totally ignore my blog in the last few years….but it’s quite difficult when you have a toddler at home…to find time to do things you love…

My little one turned one recently and it is such an exciting time for us. He’s trying to take his first few steps too….yipppeee!!! It’s such a pleasure to watch him grow up. I feel so contented. I thought I’d share a few tips on dealing with some baby issues when ever I write a new post….which will also be a good motivating factor to return to my blog. If any of you new mommies out there have any question at all, just drop me a line. I will do my best to answer. I can only give you my tried and tested tips…which might work with A but take it for granted that they MIGHT not work with your little ones 😀

OK….so here goes:

Tip 1 : A was weaned when he was 6 months old. I was not sure of “self-feeding” concept since I felt more satisfied when I fed him variety of fruits and veg. But if your child shows interest in putting spoons of food in his/her month, you have to definitely encourage the habit. I was scared of the mess A would create so fed him everything myself and he’s now used to it. OF course, babies have these phases when they show interest in self feeding and suddenly quit. But encourage their new found talents.

If you just started feeding your baby…and started off with fruit and veg purees…to which your baby is not showing any interest…I strongly suggest mixing baby rice with BREAST MILK and feeding to baby. It worked wonders with A and helped the transition onto solids.

Ok….gtg…gotta put A to sleep…but will be back sooN!!

Peace!!

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New Beginnings…

My last post was sometime in March last year…I think…and it is only apt that I start writing again on Mother’s Day. Our son A was born early October last year and since the day I found out I was pregnant, I was simply dedicated to taking care of myself and nothing else. Time flies and he is already 7 months old.

I’ll be frank here. Becoming a mother was not on the top of my agenda after S and I got married. In fact, I was always nervous about becoming a mother. I thought it would effect my relationship with S, I’ll have to give up on many things I loved, like travelling, watching movies at the cinema, going to watch plays, or just being free…free of ‘adult responsibilities’. I kept pushing it back. I didn’t want things to change. I did not want to wake up in the middle of the night for feeds neither did I want any early morning diaper changing calls. I just wanted to be. But what scared me the most was the fact that I was quite a lazy person by nature and motherhood involves a lot of hard work. It is simply not easy.

So when I found out I was pregnant, I guess I was more nervous than happy. I had heard some scare stories of friends who had a rough pregnancy and I simply crossed my fingers and hoped nothing to go wrong. The first three months were tough. There were so many new pregnancy symptoms every week, I did not know which ones to take seriously and which ones to simply ignore (only to learn later to ignore most that did not affect my pregnancy seriously). My mistake was to browse the internet for any little blip and the information overload just scared me even more. So to all the expectant mothers out there….just chill!!! You’ll know when things are seriously wrong and if you are worried about anything….just see you doctor. Do not read any book or browse the internet to find an answer.

My mum was here, cooking for me, taking care of the house so it was a smooth ride and through out the 9 months, I just wanted one thing, for the pregnancy to go well, and to have a healthy baby.

So now that A is in our lives, how have I coped with motherhood? Have my doubts been put to rest??

YES!! In fact, I cannot imagine my life without my son, even though he’s been a part of me for just 16 months. He gives me so much happiness, so much love. His smile lifts my spirits, his tear tears my heart apart. I did not know that I had this much capacity to love someone. I thought my love for S and my parents was the limit, but A brings out this vulnerability in me that no one else can. It has not been easy though. The couple of months, we were getting used to him, and he was getting used to us and the surroundings. There were times when I thought if I could not do this….I questioned myself as a mother, I wondered if I was doing a good enough job. But now, I am a confident mother, more in sync with my son. I know what he needs and when. The sleepless nights do not disturb me any more. I am actually a sleepaholic but now I cope with minimum amount of sleep and I also end up doing all the household chores, take care of A, sometimes for a full week when S is away and I always thought I would not be able to do it.

To put in simply, having my son has been the best thing in my life so far and I would not change a thing. Yes, motherhood is not easy, but the journey is fulfilling to the heart and the soul. He completes me and I am looking forward to some exciting times ahead 🙂

Love you A!!!

Homeward bound…..

…..how I wish!!!! No, I am not going back to India but I am fighting this intense urge to pack my bags and leave UK after living here for 10 years. I HAVE HAD ENOUGH of this gloomy weather, not knowing my neighbours, not seeing people on the streets, having to switch on lights the whole day due to the lack of sunlight and most of all living alone. I was talking to my dad today and asked him why he did not advise me against going to UK for my education when they had lived abroad for more than 10 years, surely they must have know how it was going to be. His answer was simple, I wanted you to experience it. Sure, I did. I learnt to work whilst studying, to live independently, to keep up my self-respect and dignity which might not have happened if I studied in India. But after 10 years, after all the things I’ve learnt, I want to go back.

I read some blogs about people contemplating to go back after living in UK/US for many many years and everyone’s concerned of how it might. Some are nervous about job prospects, some about the traffic, some corruption…everyone’s got their reasons….but let me tell you this….GO BACK IF YOUR HEART IS IN INDIA. Some of us will get to a stage in our lives when we’ll start missing the pollution of India, the cows on the roads, the traffic, the intense heat…and this is when I think is the right take to make ‘that’ decision 😉 Sure, we all miss our families back home…but it is when you miss the ‘not so nice things’ about India…that you are ready to pack your bags.

Last year, I was in India for 6 months. By the end of my holiday, it felt like I was living there and I was visiting UK. I didn’t want to leave at all. I won’t say that my holiday was all hunky dory….there were pros and cons….but the good thing about the holiday was…it gave me an insight into how life in India has changed since 2001 (when I first left). Prices have gone up….even a simple OLAY moisturising cream will cost you more than 500 bucks….parking tickets no less than 100, food prices…..don’t even get me started on this…..snide remarks from men on the streets 😉 and the disrespectful manner in which superiors treat the people who work under them. These are just some of the things I find difficult to digest….but you’ll get used to it eventually. It took me six months to soak myself back again into ‘Indian Culture’ which isn’t that long really. When the time came for me to leave….it was difficult. I was part of the system by then. When it was time to leave, It felt like 2001, the first time I left India and everyone I knew and moved to a new country….the only difference being….I was excited then….in 2009….I was sad. Nothing about returning to UK excited me….S was here and that was the only reason I wanted to to be back.

Most of my friends in UK have always told me that they’ll go back some day but no one has managed to. I always wondered why. There must be a strong reason which is keeping them here? Will I make the same mistake? If the day came when I’ve had enough and wanted to leave….I should be able to pack my bags and LEAVE….simple.

So what is it that has made me think so hard about going back? Let me tell you. I am a social animal. I need people around me all the time. I absolutely hate living alone. Unlucky me, the job market in the UK is crap….so it’s been quite difficult to find a job. I do not know if I’d want to go back if I had a 9-5 job. So anyway, for now it is S and I….we know a few neighbours and most of our friends are scattered all over UK. I barely see anyone on the streets…it’s quite odd. As a student, this was not the case. I lived in halls so you always saw someone. It is this feeling of being alone that annoys me everyday. In India, you at least have a maid who comes home everyday, the ‘phoolwala’, the vegetable vendor, the ‘sweetwala’ etc etc. It is this constant flow of people I miss. Oh….how enjoyable it was…watching my mom bargain with the ‘sweetwala’.

Your priorities change when you have kids. I don’t have any but since most of my friends do….I always end up asking them…..why do you guys still live the UK??? I see most women just stay at home once they have children. All the child gets to see is the mother and the father…and some friends who occasionally visit them but is that enough??? Since the husband goes to work….it is the wife who has to take care of everything….her world revolves around her child and all the child does is climb up the stairs and roll down ….since he/she cannot go out and play because of the disgusting weather. How boring must it be? But somehow they manage. Recently, I offered to help a friend’s son study in the evening. I asked him to bring home some of his books. Apparently, they do not have any. Whatever they need is online…..or something like that. His mom had to buy some books in a store to help him study….it was her initiative. Most of us complain about the burden Indian students are put through in schools…I agree….it is a lot….we can get some sanity into the number of books a child has to carry to school….but no books at all?????

Most of all, when I see my friends kids growing up here….without their grandparents, aunts and uncles….I wonder if they will ever have the ‘family structure’ that most of us had growing up. Family is the most important influence on young people. Meeting your grandparents, visiting them on holidays, going out with your cousins, celebrating birthdays, visiting your uncles and aunts….this is all important….isn’t it??? Because at the end of the day….you might have shit loads of money….a career to die for…but if you do not have family…..it’s not worth a single penny. I would want my children to grow up in front of their grand parents. I will not be happy with 6 month visits (which is in the hands of VFS Chennai) or a phone call when my baby starts walking….or his/her first day of school. If it’s a sports day….I want it to be a family affair….I want my children to have the opportunity of playing cricket or football or what ever they wish OUTSIDE….not just stay indoors and play stupid video games. That is how I grew up. I want them to have a ‘proper family’….not just a mother and a father.

I have so many wishes and so much optimism for the future. Not all plans work out the way we want them to…..and not all dreams come true….but I DON’T WANT TO GIVE UP ON THIS ONE!

A Wishlist

I made my first wishlist some 4 years ago and lost it and did not bother to write one until few days ago. My first wishlist had long-term goals/aspirations etc etc….nothing that could be achieved in the foreseeable future so this time I made it a point to add some short-term goals. For example, one of the items’ on my wishlist is to watch an Indian ODI match and hopefully, it will happen this August. We’ve already bought our tickets and now hoping that it doesn’t rain in Manchester that day 😀 If everything goes well, I’ll be able to strike that off my list and I will start working towards the next one.

Another item on my wishlist is to experience eagle-flying. For me, an eagle is one of the most majestic creatures’ ….regal and warrior-like. I am presuming it won’t be long before I fulfil this wish of mine. During Summer, many Zoos in UK will give its visitors an opportunity to experience this first hand. So now, it’s a matter of change in the seasons 🙂

Some of the other things on my wishlist, both long-term and short-term…

A Rolex for S

Diamonds and Rubies…my favourite gem stones. A necklace will do just fine 😀

My one and only ‘love machine’

A World Tour for the family

and last but by no means the least……

…..128.54-carat Tiffany Diamond Ring…which the husband can buy for me 😀

Hopefully, I’ll be able to strike out a few items before I am 50???

Do you guys and girls have wishlist that you’d like to share?

Wishes

Today is S’s Birthday and I am terribly busy. I baked a Banana and Walnut cake for him yesterday 😀 Yipppeeeeee. This will be just my second time…and it has turned out really good! The first time round..I baked a chocolate cake at a friend’s place…which was equally yummyy, but then she was guiding me each step of the way. I am thankful to Pras who not only helped me bake the cake but also for keeping the surprise a secret from S. He did not have a clue what was happening last night. ROFL! Somehow, I had this feeling that he knew what I was upto…but he didn’t!!!! I am sure he didn’t think I would bake a cake…I am the one who will order 😀 But the satisfaction I got after the end result was fantastic. It’s different…buying a cake and baking one. All your love, effort and hardwork goes into the one you bake…so it tastes even more delicious 🙂 I also made Vada with Coconut and Dried Red Chilli Chutney (the credit of which goes to Pras again) for breakfast, Chapala Pulusu (Smoked Salmon Fillet Curry-the credit of which goes to my mom) with Plain Rice for lunch, and probably S’s fav Peri Peri Chicken Indian Style for Dinner. Recipes will be coming up soon 🙂

Yup…the cake I baked 😀 and don’t worry…S is not 10 😀 There was no space to insert any more candles and looking at the cake…you can also say that I am not very good at decorating it either 😀

Housewives and Blogging

I blamed myself unnecessarily for not updating my blog regularly. Don’t think it’s my fault really. I was chopping vegetables today when I had one of those ‘Bodhi Tree’ moments. I realised that the reason for not being able to blog regularly was due to the amount of work at home. Not that I cook alot or do household chores daily…but the minimal work I do keeps me very much occupied…and now that spring is here…time seems to pass very quickly indeed.

I  go on walks with friends…so that keeps me occupied for the second half of the afternoon. I was telling my uni mate the other day that I founded this walking club called the Two Mile Ash South Indian Married Women’s Walking Club and I registered it with the Council and she believed me! ROFL!! 😀

This post is dedicated to all those married women…esp Asian…who do not think that the meaning of being married is just cooking, cleaning and bearing kids but also about spending time on the things we like…be it anything…blogging, photography, dancing, painting, driving etc (incidently, I happen to love the first three 😀

Some Sad NEWS: A Telugu girl was murdered last night by burglars at her University Accomodation. She was a student of Physiotherapy at Uni of Wolverhapton. If sources are to be believed, it was an attempted burglary gone wrong. She hails from Vijayawada. My heart goes out to the family. Jyothirmayi (the victim) came to the UK to study…just like I did some 7 yrs ago. Two other students who were with her at that time were seriously injured.

Okhay…gotta go! Walk time 😀

8 Things About Me You Didn’t Know :)

Thanks Liju for tagging me on this one 🙂 I love writing about myself. So when I was reading Homemaker’s blog about some of the things she likes…I decided to write one for myself and that is when Liju tagged me:)

I am doing this whilst watching Law and Order – Criminal Intent. So if you find some irrelevant stuff…please ignore! 😀

Here goes,

Eight things I am passionate about

  1. Travelling
  2. Photography
  3. Movies
  4. Music & Dance (Since they go together)
  5. History
  6. Books
  7. Social Work (Children and Women)
  8. and most importantly My Family!

Eight things I want to do before I die

  1. Skydiving. I am an Acrophobic.…so me going Skydiving is a BIG DEAL!
  2. Learn to ride a Bicycle and graduate to riding a Bike. I know. You guys might think I am pathetic…not knowing how to ride a bicycle? I fell once while riding on a slope and I haven’t given it a try since….and I was 10 yrs old then. The same goes for Swimming. So basically, I want to try and accomplish all the things I am scared of and overcome my fear
  3. Involve myself in the upliftment of abused, destitute and vulnerable Children and Women…not just by writing cheques but my including in person with the various NGO’s working for them at grassroot level. God Willing, one day, I will set up one of my own
  4. Travel the whole world…from the Americas to Australia…From Iceland to South Africa. To keep it simple….wherever there is Oxygen and Water 🙂
  5. Go on a tour of India. Discover the various temples, mosques, churches and many other religious places my country is the birth place of…the wonderful beaches, the ancient architechture, the ghat sections, the sanctuaries…everything!!!
  6. Get a body like Deepika Padukone 😀
  7. Watch my country ruled by politicians who have B**** to say NO to the West. Indian public who will treat everyone equally and a Governemt which will not divide us on the basis of Caste and Religion. Upliftment of the scores of people who still live under the poverty line and see the Capital Punishment being implemented on convicted Rapists and Paedophiles (This list will go on…so I will stop here until the next person tags me on this 🙂
  8. Last but not the least..work in the NHS. It’s been long avoiding me…but before I leave this country, I’d want to work….even for a month…and say ‘Mission Accomplished’!

Eight things I say often

  1. Mentlaa (as in Mental’aa’)
  2. This is called S*** with a Cherry on Top 😀
  3. Waste Fellow
  4. Chaaaa…..Nijanganaaa
  5. Antha Scene Ledu
  6. Over actionoddu (as in Over Action Vaddu)
  7. Bore Koduthundiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii 😦
  8. and the classic South Indian expression – Ayyayyoooooo  (my all time fav) 😀

Eight Two books I have read recently

  1. The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
  2. Days That Changed the World by Hywel Williams

Eight songs I could listen to over and over

Eight’s a little difficult…’cuz I got loadzzzz of them…but I will try and reduce it to eight with a mix of Hindi, Telugu and English Songs

Eight things that attract me to my friends

I can think of one…for the rest….you’ll have to ask them 😀

  1. My ability to continuously blabber…..sense and nonsense!

Njoy!!!